G. Max has the most important post in German Village and he knows it. He keeps watch over Schmidt's Sausage Haus with the serious dedication of someone who understands that a Bahama Mama — bratwurst im brötchen, done right — is not a thing to be taken lightly. He greets every customer with the pride of a gnome whose family has been feeding this neighborhood for generations. The cream puffs, aka the windbeutel, the whole magnificent operation: his to guard.

But it's the schokolade next door at Schmidt's Fudge Haus that really fuels him. G. Max will freely admit he dips into the fudge more than is strictly professional. He considers it a job requirement. Once the Sausage Haus closes and German Village quiets down, he laces up his lederhosen and heads out into the streets, checking on every gnome in the neighborhood one by one. Ask him how far he walks. He'll just smile and reach for another piece.